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For a minute there I thought I
was at the wrong house. Then you tried
to fetch your toast with a fork, while
it was plugged in. Now the tile
floor is scuffed up and you're all fried.

Makes my job easy. Oh don't try
to plead or beg. This is your time
to follow me, no need to lie
for a minute

or an hour. Whichever kind
of bargain you have isn't my
problem. My job is to file
your soul for future trial.
Though, I guess, I'll let you cry
for a minute.
Form: Rondeau

A poem I wrote this semester for Advanced Poetry.

A humorous take on the grim reaper on duty.

--EDIT--

A DD? WHAT? I wrote this poem as a bit of a joke. ^_^; My teacher thought my initial draft was too expected (since it was about the grim reaper guiding a child to the after life, asking them to trust him). He suggested that maybe the grim reaper was like everyone else with a day job. In a moment of sarcasm, I asked him if I should just go ahead and murder someone in the poem. His response was "Do it unexpectedly". So out of frustration, and some dark humor, I wrote this version, and took out my anger on some poor literary person with a toaster. 


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Daily Deviation

Given 2015-12-29
The Guide by Catsitta is a well-written, humorous poem featuring the Grim Reaper. ( Featured by TheMaidenInBlack )
:iconsteve-c2:
Steve-C2 Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2016
What's funny is how some quality work comes out of getting an artist cranked, yes?  :lol:

Nice job; it certainly isn't the type of grim reaper I'd expect. :D
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:iconcatsitta:
Catsitta Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2016  Student General Artist
Apparently so, yes. Heh.

Thank you. I guess that was what my professor wanted. Something unexpected.
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:iconlindartz:
LindArtz Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Congratulations on your deserved DD! :clap:
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:iconcatsitta:
Catsitta Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2015  Student General Artist
Thank you! It was so unexpected. ^_^
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:iconrjbg:
RJBG Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2015
Great work!
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:iconcatsitta:
Catsitta Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2015  Student General Artist
Thank you!
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:iconlostgryphin:
LostGryphin Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2015  Hobbyist Photographer
Amazing! Love the humor.
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:iconcatsitta:
Catsitta Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2015  Student General Artist
Thanks! I'm always kinda shy about humor based things. It's hard for me to write it since I have an odd sense of humor myself that gets me a lot of strange looks.
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:iconhawkheart29:
Hawkheart29 Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
:rofl: "Then you tried to fetch your toast with a fork, while it was plugged in." As Einstein once said, "Only two things are infinite-the universe and human stupidity. And I'm not sure about the universe." 
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:iconcatsitta:
Catsitta Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2015  Student General Artist
Very true. People do very stupid things. Hehehe. That's why there's something called the Darwin awards.
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:iconpsycocat:
psycocat Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
To think that Death might show up at the wrong house and then you have the person die in an almost humorous manner... I love it!
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:iconcatsitta:
Catsitta Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2015  Student General Artist
Thanks!
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:iconlintu47:
Lintu47 Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2015  Hobbyist Photographer
Congrats on the DD! :DALove: by Ikue
Have a nice day! :love: by CookiemagiK
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:iconcatsitta:
Catsitta Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2015  Student General Artist
Thanks so much. ^_^
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:iconlintu47:
Lintu47 Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2016  Hobbyist Photographer
My Pleasure (1) by daniya-ART
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:iconphoton-shadow:
Photon-Shadow Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
Congrats on DD! ◕ ‿ ◕
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:iconcatsitta:
Catsitta Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2015  Student General Artist
Thanks. Wow. This was unexpected.
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:iconkathleanore:
Kathleanore Featured By Owner Dec 25, 2015   Writer
Humorous indeed! I really liked it, especially the last sentence gave it a nice twist.
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:iconcatsitta:
Catsitta Featured By Owner Dec 25, 2015  Student General Artist
Thank you. ^_^ 

I rarely write humor because I generally find subjects amusing that most people frown at in confusion. So I just assume I have an odd sense of humor and don't go for this sort of thing unless it seems more, ah, more outwardly entertaining. 

So the usage of the verse "for a minute", as the form dictates, is effective in garnering amusement? Heh.
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:iconkathleanore:
Kathleanore Featured By Owner Dec 26, 2015   Writer
I think I'd laugh with you! I know what it's like to have an odd sense of humour!

I really don't know a lot about poetry, so I don't know how much value my feedback will have for you.

I found the first to stanzas, and the first 4 verses of the last one, to be rather unemotional or not empathetic towards the, well, 'client'? It has a very professional tone, from the grim reapers pov, and that's actually what I think makes your poem so humorous. That being the grim reaper is a job much like any other. The verse "Though, I guess, I'll let you cry" on the other hand gives him a human and kind of caring touch that's immediately put into perspective again by the last verse.

When you use "for a minute" for the first time, you make it sound like a minute is actually a very long period of time. It doesn't make a difference whether you lie there for an hour only just a short minute, every moment is only prolonging the unavoidable and hence sort of a waste of time. When you use the same verse at the end of the poem for a second time, the minute you refer to, as a time span, actually seems long compared to. It's like you give the same amount of time different values, but since it still is only a minute, there's some irony in it as well. I'd personally say it's this contrast that's effective in garnering amusement.

I really wish I could express myself better. I hope this was still helpful! :)       
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:iconcatsitta:
Catsitta Featured By Owner Dec 26, 2015  Student General Artist
Any critique or commentary that is constructive helps me grow as a writer. So don't worry, you expressed yourself fine. 

So what makes the poem humorous is the irony (created by the differing contexts of 'for a minute') and the fact that there is a very bored, bland grim reaper with a day job. Good to note.

As a random note, this poem started out as a very somber rondeau about death leading a child into the afterlife, and soothing him on his journey. This...was the result of my frustration at being told it was constructed well...but expected. And then the instructor made a joke about, 'maybe the grim reaper gets really frustrated at work because people keep holding him up on the job'. So I killed a random guy with a toaster and went from there. 

At least there is an empathetic air to that last repetend of 'for a minute'. I read this whole poem as dry, almost dead-panned sarcasm until the last couple lines. There is a mental shrug and sigh at the end, like a child relenting for his mother and saying "I guess so. Fine." He does lighten up at the end, slightly, knowing that humans who suffered a sudden death often have a hard time coping with the fact they are dead. Even if he is getting behind schedule. 
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:iconkathleanore:
Kathleanore Featured By Owner Edited Dec 26, 2015   Writer
Awww, I'm glad my comment was of some help.

Yes, I think it's primarily the irony and the sarcasm that make your poem humorous. Plus I actually like the image of killing of someone with a toaster. I really don't know how many people at least kill of their toasters in that way. It's like saying: Look, even if you died in a way that's Darwin award worthy, Death will be there and he's giving you some time to adjust, even though he's a busy guy having seen this before.

I think you turned your frustration into a very nice result. I actually like your initial idea as well. Maybe you could have given it a try making it more unexpected by challenging death's good intentions with a very cheeky and imprudent child asking typical child like questions. Just a thought I just had. 
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:iconcatsitta:
Catsitta Featured By Owner Dec 26, 2015  Student General Artist
Hm. A child being cheeky with death. Pestering with "Why?" and all that like children do. Heh. Maybe I'll write that poem some day. I love suggestions. It's how I write many of my newer short stories (which I don't keep on dA for various reasons). I'll take an idea and springboard it off people until something sticks.
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:iconkathleanore:
Kathleanore Featured By Owner Dec 26, 2015   Writer
Haha. I was thinking something like: "Quite a small scythe, isn't it?!" or "Are these real teeth or dentures? My granny has some!"

I too often come up with ideas for new stories like that. Though people tend to think I'm on my best way to finally loosing it completely once and for all, when I do that :D But I think that sometimes even only putting an idea into words and telling it to someone can lead to amazing new ones. 

Out of curiosity, might any of the reasons why you don't keep your short stories on dA hold true for me as well? Maybe there's a good reason not to share them here that I'm not aware of yet. Don't get me wrong, you don't have to share any personal reasons with me, you just got me thinking! :)
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:iconcatsitta:
Catsitta Featured By Owner Dec 26, 2015  Student General Artist
Hahaha! Now those are some funny ideas. 

And yes, yes I quite agree.

It's a mixture of me being possessive of original content since I'm in college and am preparing a writing portfolio for my creative writing minor (I may end up using a screenplay or short stories or a novel concept, I'm not sure). So I want to hoard it for future use and reference. Aaaand, then I have fanfiction stuff I write that doesn't really appeal to a dA audience, so I stick to a more appropriate sites. Then there's the whole, if I put it out here, I'm essentially publishing for free, and it creates mixed feelings. Would I be happy if it did well or just despondent if it did poorly? Dunno. I just haven't had the best experience getting feedback on short stories or chaptered stories on this site.
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